Fears

"...weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning..." psalms 30: 5

I really don't feel like that this morning. I woke up with so much regret and shame...more weeping. Does rejoicing really come in the morning? Fears, fears, so much fears.

I fear falling back into my old life..my sins, my cycle of shame..
I fear that Love Corps 2009 was just a dream..nothing ever happened.
I fear the faces of demons going through my mind.
I fear the incessant lies that fight their ways into my heart.
I fear temptations. I fear pain.
I fear the burden of schoolwork. which is currently, untouched.
I fear pondering upon dirty memories. false intimacy.
I fear the worthless idols I cling on to.
I fear being a lousy, ineffective Christian this coming semester.
I fear today. a lot.
I fear... fear.

I tell him, "Be merciful to me, O Lord, for I am in distress. My eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief. My life is consumed by anguish and my years by groaning; my strength fails because of my affliction." psalm 31: 9-10

and He says to me...

"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit..." psalm 34: 18
"I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears." psalm 34:4
"The fear of the Lord leads to LIFE: then one rests in CONTENT, untouched by trouble..." psalm 19:23

I replace all my fears for the FEAR OF THE LORD.